There are still days I miss the pre-baby version of myself… Luckily I’m starting to feel like a new and improved version of me every day – Raya 3.0 if you will.
Parenting definitely hasn’t gotten easier, just different, so I’ve been thinking about what on earth could have pulled me out of the fog I was in.
I know some of it has to do with my recent commitment to exercising and eating better, some of it has to do with keeping the house tidy, other bits of it are because I’m finally doing something I love for work.
BUT I think the most significant change and my real turning point, whether I recognized it at the time or not, was when I got real with my friends and family about how I was feeling and admitted that I needed more help to work through how I was feeling.
I’m notorious for trying to do everything myself – part of it is because I’m constantly being told by everything around me that I HAVE to do it all, as a mom, significant other, woman, whatever.
I understand why this started.
Women wanted to do more because we’re capable of more. But now many of us feel like we have no choice other than to do it all – and honestly, for myself and a lot of women I’ve talked to, it’s become a MAJOR pain point.
We start putting so much pressure on ourselves and think that if we ask for help, we’ve failed.
So we wait until we’re basically falling apart.
And it’s no one‘s fault but our own that we’re falling apart, so many of us hide that there’s something wrong so well that the people around us don’t even notice, or just think we’re having one bad day.
I’m sure you’ve heard the saying, “You can do it all, but not at the same time.” I am slowly getting better at understanding this.
Asking for help is literally the last thing I want to do. But I’m learning sometimes, the last thing you want to do is the first thing you need to do.
